My obsession with chasing perfection happened long before my son was born. I would read all the fashion blogs and beauty magazines and look for inspiration to make my life prettier. Endless hours wasted on articles that taught me what I needed to tweak and exactly what products I could purchase to make the new and improved me unrecognizable to my friends and family.
Let me tell you chasing perfection pre-kids is nothing compared to how perfect you are supposed to look once you have them. Not only do we need to have six-pack abs three days after giving birth, but our children have to be child models with stain, smudge, and dirt free designer clothing that costs no less than 5 times as much as mom and dad’s. Nothing less than runway ready at all times.
My house has to look like I don’t have children and God forbid his set of Legos makes it into the family picture, then it certainly must be scrapped. No dishes, messes, laundry, spills, children’s toys, children’s books, children’s artwork or children’s furniture may ever litter the child filled house.
Who are “they” that made some of this stuff normal in society? We can blame celebrities, certain mommy bloggers and the advertising industry, but the sad thing is many of us moms feel pressure to live up to these ridiculous standards. Its time to stop this insanity!
I’ve come up with my own checklist on being a perfect mom if you care to join:
How to have a perfect body: If you woke up today breathing and alive you’re pretty close to being there already. I get that we all have parts that we don’t love, but most of the time we don’t give enough credit where it’s due. Our arms are strong from carrying babies, our heads are held high from knowing we are raising impressive human beings and our legs can outrun a toddler at warp speed. Change what you can if you really want to but give yourself permission to be happy with who you are in this moment too.
How to have a perfect child: Your child is already perfectly matched to you mama. Even in their mistakes and spills and messes there is beauty to be found. What is perfect about kids is their ability to see the world through these huge, inquisitive eyes and call it like they see it.
If I’m having a rough day I try to look at the world through my son’s eyes and it always takes me back to a time of innocence and wonder. Even when he refuses a nap, spills a box of cereal on the floor, breaks my favorite necklace and then falls into a mud puddle (all of which have indeed happened in one day) I try to find the humor and wonder in it. He may not be a perfect kid but I wouldn’t love him any more if he were.
How to have a perfect home: As cliché as it sounds home is where the heart is. Whether living in a cozy apartment or a sprawling mansion home is sanctuary from the chaos in the world. It doesn’t take much to decorate. Put up some pictures and artwork that make you smile, fill it with board games and books you all love, finally organize that overflowing closet.
Don’t worry about the mess. Life is inherently messy. A true friend won’t care if they have to step over dried up Cheerios and dodge still wet paint splatters to make it to your couch. Besides there’s probably a bottle of wine waiting for their obstacle course efforts!
How to have a perfect life. First things first stop chasing a perfect life. Even if you were to spend 24 hours as your favorite celebrity sure you’d get some cool perks but you’d also have to take all the negatives that come along with it too. Some people will show you their seemingly unflawed life through social medial. Please don’t forget to realize that it’s filtered literally and figuratively. We don’t see what really goes on, the low points, the struggles, the bad days. It is an image and a moment in time that may have taken hundreds of pictures and lots of staging to create.
Here’s to all of us living perfectly imperfect lives and loving (mostly) every minute.