What Baby #3 Taught Me About Myself

Let me start by stating that I did not anticipate having three kids. I was gleefully raising two rockstar girls. And, it happened: hubby brings up having another baby. At first, I resisted. Then, after a year, I began to entertain the idea. And, ultimately, I started getting excited about the possibility of holding a newborn again. Months later, we realized we were expecting again.

There was nothing out of the ordinary with baby three. No heartburn. Slight morning sickness. Lots of hummus. My son came into this world like a rocket. Fifteen minutes of pushing and there he was. He latched on instantly from the womb (something neither of my daughters did). After being in the hospital for a few days, we thankfully went home.

As always, the first few weeks were a blur with odd sleeping schedules and nursing around the clock. However, this experience felt different than my other kiddos. It felt – dare I say – easy. As I was cuddling with my son on the couch, I shared with hubby my thoughts. “He is perfect. I don’t feel as much anxiety. What’s up?” Then, he said something that I hadn’t considered. He says, coolly and calmly, “He’s no easier to care for than the girls were. You’ve changed. You have more confidence.” Hmmm. Hadn’t thought about it that way but it was true! Here are a few things that changed from baby #1 to baby #3.

  1. I no longer cared about what the “experts” had to say about, pretty much, anything.
  2. I threw the schedule out of the door. I slept when he slept. He wants to play at 3am? Let’s do it!
  3. I trust my instincts more.
  4. When I needed help, I sought it without feeling inadequate.
  5. I treasure the small moments. 

These rules came from trial and error. I’m no longer the momma who frets over what others think. Overall, my job is to make sure my babies feel loved. I accomplish this through meeting them where they are. This means helping one discover his toes (fascinating!) and another discover her voice. I am unapologetic in my style of parenting and know that if I am unsure about something, there’s always google.

What have you learned about yourself as you’ve had more kiddos? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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