Every year we think to ourselves next year/month/tomorrow will be better than last. Hopeful thoughts and wishful thinking are a part of our Mama DNA. This year I thought and feel differently about wearing positive pants and promoting peace and joy to every mom in the thick of mommy hood.
“I know this year will be different” I said to myself and it’s not just because of positive affirmations and hopeful wishing. This year is going to be different because I have every intention to fight for it to be so. Not fight in the sense of trying to do everything myself, feeling depleted, and looking up only to realize I let my self-care and self-esteem go down the drain.
I know parts of this upcoming year will kick my behind. I have simply made a decision that it doesn’t matter. I acknowledge that people’s coping skills, tolerance for mess, and overall stress tactics widely range and at times will waver and get the best of us. Still, I’ve talked to so many women, mamas in particular, and the consensus ended with good riddance to 2017 and hello to the New Year because anything new has got to be better than what we went through last year.
I also concluded that most of us did not proactively prepare for the just around the corner mess many of us faced. We didn’t prepare because we chose to hope for the best and “deal with difficulty as it comes.” I get it, I’ve done it, and I don’t know about you but that method just did not work for me. Mindlessly choosing to not be present on the regular is actively choosing to at times to be willingly negligent.
This type of behavior led to a huge feeling of overall defeat. Rather than put up any fight I forfeited and called becoming numb a low level effort of “trying.” I mean let’s face the facts: rather than building a strong mama muscle with endurance I wound up becoming frozen in the thick of life getting tough. This would make any mother/woman feel deflated.
Until now I have created an existence of knowing what works for me but not spending time daily making appropriate changes to any of those areas. I patted myself on the back at night grateful that “I made it through another day.” Is that what it has come to, just to make it? I call insanity.
No! I have faith, as small as it may be at this particular point in my journey, that I am called as a mama to give it all I got in a smart and healthy manner. Where I am proactive more than reactive, acknowledging it’s going to hit the fan and planning for it. I realized my true non-negotiable’s this year are:
1. Mental strength training.
2. Physical exercise.
3. Proper food to fuel my mind with enough energy to make it through the day.
4. Creating and sharing my boundaries.
5. Actively participating in regimens that boost my overall self-esteem.
These are the things that will get me through and I need to train now to be ready for what storms are on the horizon. Training and prepping my entire mind, spirit, and body with armor and the faith of a mustard seed so when “it” does happen I am ready. I am ready because I fully acknowledge the encouraging light at the end of tunnel of having faith and doing the work.
I encourage the mamas reading this to acknowledge the loops and insanity cycles in their life, break the patterns down, and insert a proactive action to counter the learned behavior. After completing this step make your non-negotiable’s list AND stick with it!
Fight for your peace of mind proactively this year before the chaos, challenging learned behavior, and storms as they appear. Embrace the moments of good but acknowledge we have work to do. Stir up encouragement in yourself and offer it to another mama. We know what’s required of us, what is too much, and what WE need individually to be our best selves.
Don’t allow excuses of “it” happening and not taking care of yourself in, before, and after the storm because we already know it’s coming. It is time to get ready mama.