I don’t do it all, but I still do a lot. My days are full between running a household, owning a business, social time, staying current with Teen Mom (Free Butch, anyone?), the list goes on. But even with all of this on my mind, I still can close my eyes at the end of a long day and feel satisfied. Sure, I think of the load of laundry I forgot to put in the dryer or the customer I forgot to email back. But, I’ve made up my mind to consider every day a success. We can’t do it all, but we can do a lot.
I know so many of us are overtired, overscheduled, and overworked. It’s easy to feel like our lives are out of our control we never win, but why would you do that to yourself? It’s all about that spin, how we program our brains and what we tell ourselves every day over and over. Is now a good time to mention that I watch a lot of Dr. Phil?
So, I got in a workout but didn’t do the laundry? Yay, I exercised, good job me! Snuck in a coffee date with an old co-worker instead of taking a shower? Who gives a crapola! I got a giggle boost for the day and anyone who would judge you for the amount of dry shampoo in your hair is not a friend you need around! I’ve cuddled up during many episodes of Doc McStuffins with an overflowing sink of dishes mocking me from the corner of my eye. I feel totally fine about all of that because we can do a lot, but we can’t do it all.
I don’t have all of the answers (and I plan to steal some from all of you), but here are some things that have helped me. I do what I need to do, what I want to do, and feel pretty darn pleased with myself as I apply my wrinkle cream and snuggle in for the night.
- I say no a lot. Like Nancy Reagan’s, “Just Say No”, she was on to something. It isn’t always popular, but I don’t really do things that I don’t want to do. I’m a people pleaser, so this one can be tricky. But if we fill our calendar with every birthday party and committee that we’re asked to attend, it leaves little time to rejuvenate and do the things we need to do. It isn’t mean, it’s just setting boundaries for yourself and not over extending your commitments. Your time is valuable.
- I do a lot of planning and prioritizing. My brain works best when I stick to a routine and have it mapped out in my planner to help me stay on task. I have certain household chores that I do the same day every week. If I don’t change the sheets on the scheduled day, I do it later in the week (and some weeks it just doesn’t happen). I have certain times of the day I generally do business and certain times of the day that are off limits. The point is, I have a flexible plan so I have a guideline for how I’ll spend my day so I don’t waste as much time (unless wasting time is the plan, love those days!).
- I cut corners. What convenience we can afford, we do. We use Kroger Clicklist to pick up our groceries, we get endless boxes on our doorstep thanks to Amazon Prime. Sometimes someone else cleans my house, sometimes someone else watches my children. If I can find an easier way to do something, that’s the route I take. #outsource
- I’m not trying to be a Professional. I can cook, but I’m not a Gourmet Chef. I like to break a sweat, but I’m not a Fitness Expert. I think my house is cute, but it isn’t going to grace the pages of a styling magazine anytime soon. I don’t stress myself out trying to reach expert level at the things that interest me. I’m happy to be good enough at a lot of different things if it brings me joy to do them.
- I mind my own business. If it isn’t the Pearson Family on Tuesday night, I don’t let other people’s drama fill my head. I’m a sponge when it comes to emotions, so I’ve learned that if it doesn’t effect me, I have to ignore it and not get involved. Otherwise, I’ll spend my time trying to solve other people’s problems (even if they didn’t ask for my advice!).
The more in control that I feel I am of my own life, the happier I am. I set boundaries, I make plans, I get help and I stay in my own lane. It works for me. What do you do to feel like you’ve been a good mom for the day?