I’m not a cool mom, I’m an awkward mom

I’m not a cool mom, I’m an awkward mom…but I hope you’ll love me anyway!

Let’s go way back to the days of Trapper Keepers and Ace of Base.  I’m talking about the mid-90s when I was in middle school. Can you smell the Teen Spirit?  I’m talking about when a boy, “liked you more than a friend” and you knew you’d spend your evening wrapped around the phone cord of your landline talking about it.  You’d talk at school, pass notes, maybe go out on a group date to see Forrest Gump. Yes, I’m assuming you handled that situation like a typical teenager. Spoiler alert, I did not! One mention of someone liking me and I would head for the hills.  So awkward, I could barely handle the pressure. I’d like to say it got better, but it took years to learn that boys weren’t terrifying.

Fast forward, oh 25 years or so, and I’ve found that making mom friends isn’t all that different from meeting boys in middle school.  You want them to like you and you hope you like them back because putting yourself out there is hard. You wonder if they’ll ask you on a (mom) date and if you’ll be able to escape your house . If you reach out will they get back to you or will they reject you?  Some people are so smooth about it, but the whole thing throws me into a tizzy just like those old middle school days.

Here’s where I continue to go wrong, try as I may, but I hope you’ll love me anyway!

This awkward mom tries way too hard.
I laugh at myself because I’m the human version of a new puppy, I get way too excited to see another adult.  Especially a mom who looks like we should be peeps. I’ve tried to control it, but for some reason my brain jumps ship and before I know it I’ve been blabbing for ten minutes about who knows what. Sometimes word vomit gets the best of me.  I’ll calm down, catch my breath, and then ask about your day like a normal, non-crazy person should.

This awkward mom doesn’t know what to say.
I grin and bear it because I struggle with small talk.  Through thousands of visits to the park, I’ve finally started to master the art of playground babble.  You have to know you’ll be interrupted by every scraped knee, every squabble over the slide and every request for a sippy cup.  Keep it casual, light and short.

This awkward mom is flying by the seat of her pants.
You guys, I have no idea what I’m doing.  I read the books and do my research, but just as I conquer one phase another stage pops up and I’m starting all over again.  There’s so much to learn. I don’t stress about it, but it definitely brings up some awkward moments with my fellow moms. When discussing a parenting topic I’ll probably just shrug and attempt to download all of your knowledge directly from your brain to mine.

Making friends in your 20s was easier because of ahem, alcohol, but now I have to face that awkwardness head on. When the party favors are goldfish and wet wipes, I know I’m going to be Awkward Annie just ripping it up. I’d rather be awkward with friends than awkward alone, so this is what I do. So here’s to all of the awkward moms!

I’m not a cool mom, I’m an awkward mom

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